Twins’ Santana, Baltimore’s Bundy look to rebound from poor starts

Twins’ Santana, Baltimore’s Bundy look to rebound from poor starts

Tuesday, 23 May 2017

Join us Tuesday at 6 PM CST as the Minnesota Twins look to continue their success against the Baltimore Orioles in Baltimore. If you haven’t noticed by now, Fuck Dick and Bert is an uncensored broadcast meant to serve as an alternative to the Dick and Bert in the booth, so please don’t write us any letters or emails requesting we stop swearing. It’s just not in the baseball cards.

Game 42: Minnesota Twins @ Baltimore Orioles

We’ll be at Shantytown in Bloomington to guide you through this adventure we call Twins baseball. You’ll notice our style here at FDB is a bit different than Dick and Bert’s. I’ll actually talk about life during the broadcast and hopefully provide you with products and services that will improve your life, all without taking a commercial break. See if you can guess when I’m taking a piss during the broadcast. Maybe we’ll send you some schwag. I’ve been told we have a pretty cool logo that looks good on hats.

As far as the game goes, I’ve got my money on Ervin Santana and the Twins despite Santana coming off a rough start against Colorado back at Target Field. But Santana, the consummate professional, went seven innings despite allowing five runs on six hits. The moneyline was -138 for Baltimore last I checked, and the Twins get my money because they had 21 hits last night and came back from down five runs to beat Baltimore in the series opener. Plus, Baltimore starter Dylan Bundy is also coming off a rough start himself against the Tigers when the righty allowed six runs on eight hits over six.

The Matchups

The Twins haven’t seen much of Bundy, with Sano having the only hit for the squad in one at-bat. Baltimore’s seen plenty of Santana, though, with Seth Smith, the whitest guy you know, is batting .235 in 17 ABs, Manny Machado hitting .286 in seven at-bats, and Mark Trumbo hitting .600 with one dinger in five ABs.

The Twins are still holding off Cleveland by a game in the AL Central but would like to stay alone in first. So turn on the TV, turn off Dick and Bert, and turn up Fuck Dick and Bert as we prepare for the first pitch and first drink of the game.

Fuck Dick and Bert is brought to you by, the foul-mouthed, sports broadcasting community. is your source for live, uncensored play-by-play and color commentary during select games, and if you’d like to join the community and try your foul-mouth at broadcasting, visit

Click below to tune into the game via our Awdio broadcast and thanks for listening!

Anthony Varriano

Anthony Varriano is a news director for, editor of, and founder and editor of He has been writing about Minnesota Twins baseball since 2009 and has hosted a live, uncensored, commercial-free broadcast during select Twins games.

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